No, not like that. That doesn't look fun at all. You have to be wearing pretty clothes, duh.
You can buy our fabulous outfits at Carly'sCloset boutique if you call in the next 0.1 seconds. Too late! You slow. :P |
Now, children. Let me tell you a story:
Once upon my friend Jane decided that her mission in life was to be the real slim shady.
She first had to find all the other so-called 'slim shady's' so she could kill them and claim her rightful title. So she was all
May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here..
I stood up.
That was my big mistake. For Jane was thinking, "aha. So this is my big competition. A Hawaiian tourist dressed for skiing." And I was thinking "I didn't know Eminem was an insane gender-confused cosplayer!"
That's when a crazed USC fan dashed into the stadium screaming and waving its arms. "Gooooo.....OCTOPUSES!" it yelled, doing jumping jacks.
"The team mascot isn't the octopus...." I pointed out.
"I know. I just like octopuses," the fan argued. That's when we all gave up being slim shady and made kissy faces at the camera.
Gimme a kiss, hun! |
Looks like there's only one bottle of beer on the wall now. |
The fan was heartbroken, so to cheer it up I suggested we build a human tower. "Great idea, Maggie!" everyone cheered. Since the pyramid was a little out of our reach we did the "centipede doing a handstand."
OM NOM NOM |
Then, the fan heard there was a USC game on and rushed off to see it. Unfortunately the fan wasn't allowed through the gates so it sat on the security guards and farted until they surrendered.
Never underestimate the power of beans. |
This is us, slightly drunk off of the fan's farts, which had a similar effect as laughing gas or perhaps dancing turtles. |
It was only through the magical cure of chocolate dipped bananas and threats of everlasting bunions that I came back to life. My hat was missing but the angels had given me a cupcake during my short stay with them, so I wore that instead. They also gave me starbucks coffee, because starbucks is heaven.
What is it with me and wearing cupcakes on my head?! |
We all eventually forgave Jane for her past misdeeds and took the vow of silence. We became monks and everything. That is, until I realized I wasn't allowed to refashion the monks' robes.
And that, kids, is why you should host fashion shows using the bounty of a friend's closet.
<3 Maggie
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