No, not like that. That doesn't look fun at all. You have to be wearing pretty clothes, duh.
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You can buy our fabulous outfits at Carly'sCloset boutique if you call in the next 0.1 seconds. Too late! You slow. :P |
Now, children. Let me tell you a story:
Once upon my friend Jane decided that her mission in life was to be the real slim shady.
She first had to find all the other so-called 'slim shady's' so she could kill them and claim her rightful title. So she was all
May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here..
I stood up.
That was my big mistake. For Jane was thinking, "aha. So this is my big competition. A Hawaiian tourist dressed for skiing." And I was thinking "I didn't know Eminem was an insane gender-confused cosplayer!"
That's when a crazed USC fan dashed into the stadium screaming and waving its arms. "Gooooo.....OCTOPUSES!" it yelled, doing jumping jacks.
"The team mascot isn't the octopus...." I pointed out.
"I know. I just like octopuses," the fan argued. That's when we all gave up being slim shady and made kissy faces at the camera.
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Gimme a kiss, hun! |
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Looks like there's only one bottle of beer on the wall now. |
The fan was heartbroken, so to cheer it up I suggested we build a human tower. "Great idea, Maggie!" everyone cheered. Since the pyramid was a little out of our reach we did the "centipede doing a handstand."
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OM NOM NOM |
Then, the fan heard there was a USC game on and rushed off to see it. Unfortunately the fan wasn't allowed through the gates so it sat on the security guards and farted until they surrendered.
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Never underestimate the power of beans. |
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This is us, slightly drunk off of the fan's farts, which had a similar effect as laughing gas or perhaps dancing turtles. |
It was only through the magical cure of chocolate dipped bananas and threats of everlasting bunions that I came back to life. My hat was missing but the angels had given me a cupcake during my short stay with them, so I wore that instead. They also gave me starbucks coffee, because starbucks is heaven.
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What is it with me and wearing cupcakes on my head?! |
We all eventually forgave Jane for her past misdeeds and took the vow of silence. We became monks and everything. That is, until I realized I wasn't allowed to refashion the monks' robes.
And that, kids, is why you should host fashion shows using the bounty of a friend's closet.
<3 Maggie
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